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A Million Dollar Wedding, infertility, separation and anxiety – all treated by Chinese Medicine aboard a Caribbean cruise ship

Sunday at 0745

Solstice My Love Chapter Four

The moment I had entered the restaurant “Grand Apernei”, Predrag my Serbian friend immediately saw me over the heads of some diners and turned and headed towards me. The restaurant, called affectionately “the dining room” contains at a time 550 diners on two levels and 250 waiters. It serves mainly guests (2,000 on average) in four shifts, starting at six in the evening and ending at midnight.

This is the first time I’ve visited the restaurant during dinner. Every Sunday at 1545, on hearing the emergency siren, we stop the embarkation procedure to go to our emergency mustering station – which is at this restaurant. We wear bright vests and guide the guests to sit and prepare to see the emergency video and listen to our Greek captain who runs the weekly emergency drill.

Right away Predrag offered me a seat in the restaurant designated for guests only and a Kosher meal out of closed boxes – like airplane meals. I refused thankfully as I had already eaten my dinner and I didn’t want to bother him with a special meal for me at his last supper.

As I wake up at six thirty every morning and arrive in the Ocean View Cafe at about seven, I’ve sat with Predrag a couple of times for breakfast. Recently, our friendship grew, especially after the seminar I did for the F & B – food and beverages team. I have already had dinner in the Ocean View and only came to the restaurant to say goodbye. Just this morning he informed me he was leaving The Solstice the following morning after the landing in Fort Lauderdale – to be a restaurant manager in another ship. He would do that for two months and then he would move to the new Celebrity ship, the Solstice’s sister ship which is having a debut voyage in the Baltic before reaching the United States. So just before a new ship is launching, there is a movement of professional and experienced staff from other ships to the new one. It is considered a great honour and a prestige to “open” a new ship and whoever has done this is proud to mention the fact.

We hugged and exchanged email addresses. Just a few weeks onboard and I am already begin to “lose” friends. I’m rather sorry to lose such a friend so quickly, but also happy for Predrag’s promotion. Very quickly I will adapt to the fast lifestyle and mobility of the staff around me – in the Spa as well.

I wish I could be in Israel and host him and his mother in Tel Aviv for several hours, as soon they will be at Yad Vashem for the honour given to his grandmother as The Righteous Human she had been for Jews at the Second World War. (See Solstice My Love Chapter One).

Although it seems like it…this is not yet the end of my story with Predrag…life has brought us together once again…

Every Sunday at 1pm the Spa is opened to the hundreds of visitors who flood in, meet the various therapists and order treatments. Only half an hour after opening the spa embarkation tour last Sunday I was approached by a tall, broad guest who introduced himself as Rick and asked if I could handle an emergency case. Although he spoke very quietly the man seemed frightened and anxious.

His wife Sandy has just come to the ship and has had an anxiety attack. She wants to get off the ship before we lift anchor at 4.30pm. I responded immediately. I posted my embarkation position with Dana, and coordinated with Rick as to where to bring his wife and then I moved quickly towards the spa treatment rooms. Sandy was brought in after only a few minutes. She was professionally diagnosed and treated quickly and effectively. Sandy is a great woman and a very colourful one. The Acupuncture treatment relieved her tension and anxiety and reassured her “grounding”. At the end of the first treatment she decided to stay on board and enjoy the Cruise. She signed up and continued with four more treatments and also acquired Chinese Herbs.

Rick’s relief following the treatment’s results was very evident. Word of the dramatic treatment and its positive results quickly spread throughout the ship directly from the mouth of the outgoing Sandy. This is always good to have at the beginning of the cruise, as the guests meet at dinner and speak of their adventures of the day. Additionally, this time the director of the casino came and thanked me personally because the couple loves to gamble and has thus invested quite a bit of money at the casino aboard the ship. Sandy is also born Jewish – but rather distant from Judaism. Rick converted to Judaism for her and is carrying a huge gold chain with a Chai. This is a combination of two Hebrew letters the 8th and 10th חי, that together mark the number 18 and also in this combination means “Life”. He was a little embarrassed when I pointed out to him that he wore the Chai the opposite way … Maybe because he might have put it on in front of the mirror …

It is pretty amazing to see Americans with so many ailments and with addictions to various drugs that are so destructive. Antidepressants are taken casually by most people. It looks like a conspiracy of the pharmaceutical companies to pump hard drugs into the veins of people who take them eagerly. In my seminars, I stress the enormous pharmaceutical difference between the Western Drugs and their side effects and the Chinese Herbal Formulas.

J. Sandler (not a relative of Adam) came to the Spa Desk and asked to be treated by me, having read my resume displayed at the spa. However, he rejected all my attempts to give him Chinese Herbal Formulas in addition to Acupuncture. J. is a nice Jewish boy aged 32 and married for 8 years to Deborah, his junior by a year. They had been trying to have a child for several years now and so far had been through two unsuccessful IVF treatments. Deborah took the fertility treatment with much scepticism and agreed to three treatments, but with Acupuncture alone. It’s very frustrating when you have the experience and the solution for the problems of people and they will not at all try it. This is most frustrating especially when my experience of working so long with fertility problems tells me that’s exactly what they need as a solution. Still I’m glad I was able to put a foot in the door and it may be that they will continue with another therapist back home. Later, J. also brought in for treatment his father S., a successful international lawyer. We talked a bit about the law and much more about resolution of the Israeli – Palestinian conflict.

I can say it is generally harder to work with Americans. Maybe because they are over-marketed in every aspect of their lives. I have a much more easy time with Canadians and especially with Spanish speakers from Mexico, Chile, Ecuador, Colombia or Venezuela.

The Baths, Margaret and Maynard, are from Canada and have been together for 43 years. I met them on embarkation eve standing close to the spa desk and I heard Maynard wants a massage for a chronic back pain he was suffering from for many years. Within minutes he was persuaded to come for Acupuncture as well as a massage. The next day I presented the weekly seminar and Margaret, his wife who attended, joined so that they were treated both with Fives. Maynard left the ship with a healthy new direction of thought about his medical well-being. Margaret went out with a bag full of useful tools to reduce stress and anxiety.

 I got to handle quite a lot of couples aboard cruises. Sometimes one spouse begins to get care, is impressed and brings his / her spouse. Sometimes they come together, especially after a seminar. To advise couples is a very delicate task. In my experience there is always the added value for a couple of marital therapy and insight into their life together, beyond solving medical problems each spouse has separately.

Fortunately I brought back together four couples who came onboard to summarise divorce proceedings. A good holiday atmosphere and the treatments probably allowed the positive coping and re-evaluation of what has already been achieved in their life together. Did you know that there is no equivalent English word for the Hebrew word Zugiyut, loosely translated as “COUPLENESS”…

One couple who came together following my seminar, for a quintet each were Leslie and John. John is a very big man, tall and broad who does everything for the welfare of his wife in an automatic, self-effacing manner. His wife begs him to offer things instead of responding to every wish and whim she brings up. I tried to explain to John that he must behave in a balanced way if he wants his wife to stay by his side in the future. To Leslie I suggested she resign from the second job she had taken upon herself. John is an owner of a private supermarket with 27 employees. She may stop working completely, he claims. I think this will reduce the stress she was suffering from which is manifested by tinnitus in her ears. She will have also more time for herself and will be able to do what she always wanted to do – learn Greek with the priest from the church they belong to.

Certainly in terms of my career with Chinese Medicine I’m currently at my peak. The intensity of my work onboard keeps me very sharp. The knowledge and experience I have now after more than 20 years of practice helps me a lot. I have more and more patients whom I treat by intuition and good rapport, rather than technique.

I remember the words of Dr. Stanley one of the teachers in “ACTCM” – my College in San Francisco: “Chinese Medicine is a profession that is easy to learn but very hard to master” – so true. My healing abilities greatly intensified. I’m able to quickly diagnose and offer treatment at the highest professional level.  I am very self-confident and radiate great charisma. My whole life’s experience to date is expressed during each and every treatment.

I can respect and speak openly to the last cleaners without patronizing them and I treat as equals the rich of the world as well as ship’s captain, without feeling any inferiority. Two out of the three captains aboard the ships I have worked on were treated with Chinese Medicine by me.

I’m also working out (cardio) at least once a week. When I’m not working I think about how to promote the marketing of Chinese Medicine throughout the ship. One has to be creative and bold to compete with so many things that are offered, but without breaking the rules and standards.

The manifestation of all that is evident in the level of revenue I make in return for treatments and from sales of the Chinese Herbal formulas. In my opinion this has reached an all-time record aboard cruise ships. Normally the herb stocks are renewed for every ship every six months. My stock is being liquidated and has disappeared within six weeks.

A large portion of patients (we are guided to call them guests) undergo accelerated healing. A high percentage of it belongs to the set up of the Solstice and the fact that large variety of nutritional possibilities are very easy to obtain onboard. Many of the guests noted that the treatments of Chinese Medicine are the best thing that happened to them during the cruise. Some write letters of thanks and I zeroxed the best of them and presented them to sceptical cruise guests – and you always get those. Now these heart warming letters are displayed in my Tel Aviv clinic. Some of the guests have invited me to visit their homes and some have become friends for life. There is a great satisfaction in the knowing one has of the ability to make a drastic change for the better in another’s life.

L. Gottfard is a very pleasant lady who is an interior designer of the upper echelons. Following dental treatment that injured a nerve in her face she suffers from an intense pain in the right cheek for the last 3 months. Analgesics have become her best friends. She heard my seminar on Monday and decided to come for treatments.  Fortunately, 5 treatments plus accurate dietary guidelines have solved the problem as if it had never been.

The Solstice had changed its course and direction and headed directly west toward the descending fireball on the horizon. This happened at a perfect timing just as the marriage of Marcus Katz (third marriage) and Pearl (second marriage) was announced to the applause of 187 guests. Everybody enjoyed the real lawn stretching finely over deck 15, the upper deck, also known as the “golf course”. Then the captain had to look for the barge that was waiting in one of the islands and was supposed to meet us. When eye contact was made with the barge it started launching fireworks into the sky for several long minutes to the cheers of the guests and staff.

I learned a lot about Marcus from Carrie and Camie a couple who were invited to the wedding and took five treatments each. They told me Marcus Katz made his fortune in student loans. Marcus is so rich and generous that he had invited all 187 guests to attend the wedding at his expense and paid for their suites from his own pocket. Instead of receiving gifts from his stunned guests he preferred that they contribute to the charity that he runs.

Elsa Goldberg a charming 69yr old first cousin from Tucson Arizona, was also treated by me and told me that Marcus (60) is the adopted son of her aunt and uncle, that he made his fortune with his own hands and had not inherited anything from his poor parents who were Jewish immigrants from Eastern Europe.

So it happened that on the morning of the wedding I took care of the bride Pearl (45 and from Nebraska, a real sweetie) to relieve her stress and ease the sea sickness she felt. And the next day after the wedding I took care of Caroline, the mother of the bride who had problems related to menopause.

During the following week I took care of Andre (an American of French origin), a restaurateur who lives in Carmel, California. He had once worked for Marcus as a chef. His treatment focused on digestive problems, stress relief and strengthening of the kidneys (the Chinese). A very nice man  Andre – and a great person to talk to. He had started as a chef aboard a ship in the French Navy and always knew he wanted to live in America. So when he was released from the navy he headed to the states and worked as a chef.  When Andre worked for Marcus and asked for a raise of a $200 to his monthly salary Marcus replied that it was not possible because there was no room for it in the budget. On the other hand, immediately after that, he transferred ownership of a new Lexus car from his son to Andre as a compensation of $20,000…

And so without any planned agenda and without my patients knowing of each other, I was drawn into the amazing “Telenovela” of Marcus Katz. I did not see Marcus at all during that cruise – so the man and the legend will remain seared in my brain without a face attached…

The wedding cruise was the first one following the Atlantis Cruise, a cruise intended only for gay men (see Chapter III). Some of the wedding guests were celebrities, so all of a sudden the percentage of well kept beautiful gorgeous women rose drastically. The wedding eve most of them visited the spa salon, dressed up for the wedding, to have their hair and nails done. I found myself staring at them in admiration. I know many of them use the wonders of surgical medicine and Botox but still, such a concentration a delightful feminine energy after last week’s masculinity was refreshing as well as exciting.

I get to talk often with different waiters I meet in The Ocean View. They are from many nations such as Indonesia, Turkey, Honduras, Philippines, Serbia, Croatia, three brothers from Macedonia (Ruby and the twins) and more. Their personal stories are fascinating and very skilfully presented, because the guests often ask them about their own countries. For some guests the waiters are the only people they talk to throughout the cruise.

Indians for example are divided into two main streams. Hindus who come from Mumbai and Chennai (formerly Bombay and Madras respectively) and Christians who come from Goa (a former Portuguese colony). It turns out the historical reason Christians from Goa work outside India is due to the fact that for generations they were discriminated against and persecuted by Hindus who opposed the Christian faith. So they were the first to leave for work outside India into the welcoming Christian world. This tradition has been maintained until today. There were many Goans aboard the Solstice. They are easy to identify due to their Indian features and Portuguese first and last names, like my friend Antony DaCosta aboard the Summit. Most Christians wish to work aboard cruise ships that visit Israel so they may see the Holy Land at least once in their lifetime.

Sadok (who was perhaps originally called Tzadok?) is a maitre d’ (40, Tunisian from the town of Sus), the younger brother of five, with a wife and three sons. He looks a lot more Jewish to me than many Jews from Tunisia I know… We happen to meet in the Ocean View and we talked about Tunisia, Jerba Jews and politics, but from a Tunisian-Sunni moderate and peaceful view. Bourguiba, Tunisia’s first president after its liberation has deliberately chosen not to call the state the Islamic Republic, but only the Tunisian Republic. Sadok reminded me of the Bourguiba Plan that was rather famous in the 1970s. Only now it is evident how it was ahead of its time regarding a peaceful solution in the Middle East. Last week Sadok came to the clinic for a treatment and received all the discounts I had offered for the F&B team at the seminar given especially for them.

We did not know then that about a year later, a great revolution will begin in his country, because of a slap, delivered by a lady inspector, to the face of a vegetable seller, who indignantly burned himself to death.

This week was first time in many weeks I could sit with Anna, the spa manager, for a spontaneous, heart-to-heart conversation that was not to do with labor relations. I understood, between the lines, that she had spoken with G. the Israeli security officer about me. It was a conversation between two equal people and it was excellent. She told me about her childhood and her relationship with her parents and it was fascinating to see the vulnerable person behind the facade of a tough and demanding manager. What has mainly been achieved through this conversation is an understanding of the complexity of the situation and a mutual respect built into the hard work and focus of both of us for the same cause. She did not appreciate at all the young girls at the spa who think only, according to her, of the romantic ties with male senior staff on the ship with the work itself as only secondary. Basically the spa manager receives a percentage of all spa revenues and bonuses if the Target is met… so I’m also working for her, among other factors that take the Lion’s share…

Yesterday, Saturday, at 2030 Anna announced at the spa staff meeting the summation of the ending cruise and the preparations for the next one. As usual, she announced the names of the top revenue makers and I was among them. The next thing she said was that she has family problems at home and she has to leave for 5 weeks!  I was surprised and also horrified regarding the future. A very strong Spa Manager is like an infantry platoon sergeant in boot camp. You are willing to die for him as much as he is hated by you for all the humiliations and harassments caused by him to you. The few weeks we spent together were so intense and hectic that it is not so strange there were very strong dealings between us.

Apparently I was the only one who had not heard before the official announcement about her leaving. This is why I was very surprised and a little bit shocked. She thanked the staff and the reactions of the brown noses followed immediately.

Sweet Chelsea who had finished a 9-month contract (British, 26, massage therapist) just had time to say goodbye to everyone, saying the contract made her go through many changes. She broke up with her fiancé, she stopped being a vegetarian and started drinking in the crew bar… Then everyone dispersed quickly, and I went and found Anna in her office.

She sat at the computer and typed. Without stopping she said in a quiet and conciliatory tone that she was writing a few lines for the Spa Manager that is coming to replace her. I vaguely remembered our first personal conversation and our last (how many years ago was that?) and asked whether she is leaving because something has happened to her parents. She said quietly that her father had died some time ago and that her mother had threatened to kill herself and that Anna’s brother proved once again how incompetent he is and therefore she is forced to stop working for several weeks and try to bring her mum into an appropriate institution.

I was filled with grief and sorrow, pity and compassion for her. She added quietly that the months before she came to the Solstice were hell for her and that she thought that the beginning of the work after the death of her father would mark a new beginning and how she was disappointed because of the constraint to leave now. At this point I was choking on my emotions welling up with her pain and asked to leave for a moment to compose myself.

When I returned she was gone. After waiting several minutes I left a note in which I let her know she was welcome to call me on my mobile or in my room and receive encouragement and support. She did not call and I never saw her again.

The dogs are barking and the ship is sailing …

Effi Kfir L. Ac

The Solstice dock – Fort Lauderdale, Florida.

 

To be continued in the Fifth chapter of Solstice my Love.

 

About the Author

Effi Kfir is a specialist in Chinese Medicine with over 20 years experience specializing in the areas of Pain, Headache, Backache, Digestive problems, Stress reduction, Weight gain, Respiratory problems, Gynecology, Obstetrics, and Fertility. He is an Acupuncturist and Herbalist licensed by the State Board of California and 30 other states in the U.S. He completed a specialized practice in 3 hospitals in China and Japan and lectured at Bar Ilan University in several Doctoral courses. He also worked at MALRAM in the complementary medicine unit at Ichilov hospital. During 2010 and until his return to Tel Aviv in April 2011, Kfir worked as a Chinese Medicine specialist aboard 3 American Cruise Ships (Solstice, Liberty of the Seas and The Summit) in North America and the Caribbean. He treated members of the staff,  crew and guests from over 70 different nationalities, he successfully treated many conditions and was consistently ranked among the top performers in the Acupuncture area.  His website  www.kfir.net  provides information on some very important syndromes treated by Chinese Medicine, Kfir’s two published text-books, and some useful health tips. Kfir’s clinic is located in the heart of Tel Aviv. for appointments please call: 03-5225510 or 054-4804538

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